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SHUT UP! These DO Count as Christmas Movies

Ho, Ho, Ho, and Merry Christmas! What’s that you say? You want a list of movies that, while maybe not typical Christmas fair, still can count as a “Christmas Movie?” You want the “SHUT UP! These DO Count as Christmas Movies List?” Well I hear you loud and clear! So don’t be a Grinch, and add these films to your yule-tide watching!

10. L.A. Confidential

There's a Christmas killer on the loose and the law isn’t going to cut it. It’s going to take a special brand of justice to bring this psycho down. In the mood for a yule-time noir? Then pop on L.A. Confidential for a classic detective story set to festive lights


9. The Long Kiss Goodnight

Shane Black loves setting the films he writes (and sometimes directs) during a holiday of some kind. And Christmas seems to be his favorite. This action packed thriller about a woman discovering there’s more to her identity than she thought is set during the Christmas season. It even features a climactic chase through a holiday parade. How festive!


8. The Shining

While it may not technically take place specifically on Christmas, The Shining does take place over the winter months and so the Torrence family had to have Christmas at the Overlook. Though, I doubt it was a jolly one. So add this one to your list and snuggle up tight under the blankets for a late night watch.


7. Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang

The second Shane Black film on the list (trust me, there will be more), is also a total blast! Robert Downey Jr. plays a thief who, in an attempt to evade the police, must pretend to be an actor for a P.I. film. So he’s teamed up with a real P.I. (Val Kilmer) and together they stumble upon a REAL murder. This film is a hilarious and action packed romp. And its Christmas setting means you can totally get away with choosing this at your family holiday gatherings.


6. Iron Man 3

Hi Shane! We’ve become so close during this short time. I feel like I know you. Like how I knew when they announced you would write and direct Iron Man 3, you would set it during Christmas. The good news is that this time around, the Christmas setting also plays into the theme of the film. Sort of. Tony must shed his armor and in doing so, reveals a softer side of himself. He also get’s a short side kick. Do children count as elves?


5. Rare Exports

Did you know that Santa is real? Real evil! That’s why he was sealed away deep in the mountains of Finland. Just don’t dig him up or else you’ll have to content with all the horror, and hilarity that young Pietari had to deal with. This film is a real Christmas treat. A dark take on Santa with just enough of a wink and nod. Be sure to grab some old fashioned egg nog to pair with this holiday horror hoot.


4. Black Christmas (1974)

A Christmas horror classic, hands down. None of the remakes or imitators can compare. One of the first slasher films ever made (yes, even before Halloween), Black Christmas film paved the way for horror cinema. This gritty and unflinching story of a group of sorority girls being hunted over Christmas break remains one of the greatest horror

(and Christmas) films, ever.


3. Batman Returns

You knew it would be on here. Just admit it, you already considered this one a Christmas movie, didn’t you? See, that wasn’t so hard! But anyway, Michael Keaton kills it in his second go-around as the Caped Crusader, and he brings along new friends Michell Pfeiffer, Danny DeVito, and Christopher Walken for the ride! This movie is fantastic, and is simply dripping with holiday set decorations and references. Just don’t leave your children unattended as you go to the Gotham Christmas Ball, or else

Penguin might snatch them up!


2. Lethal Weapon

Okay, okay, this is the last Shane Black film on the list, I promise. But it’s also the most Christmas-y of his movies, as the holiday is not just a simple set dressing in this film, but a part of the story itself. By the end of the film, Riggs is finally able to have a new family with Murtaugh and he, for the first time in years, doesn’t have to spend Christmas alone. The action is fast, the jokes are furious, and the explosions aplenty. Merry Christmas!


1. Die Hard & Die Hard 2

You knew it, didn’t you? Yeah, yeah, I know, it was obvious. Of course Die Hard and Die Hard 2 (I refuse to call it Die Harder) would be number one on this list! The Christmas action movie that was debated hotly for years! But you all knew deep down it was a holiday favorite. Both films have that seasonal feeling to them, and deal with John reuniting with loved ones for the holidays. He just always seems to be in the wrong place at the wrong time doesn’t he? So this Christmas Eve, instead of watching something typical like It’s a Wonderful Life, or Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, fire up the flat screen tv and blast that surround because

“Ho, ho, ho. Now I have a machine gun.”

Have a wonderful Holiday season, everyone!



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